edToolbar()Is being a parent wearing you out? Are you at the end of your rope? Do you feel like your children or teenagers are always arguing with you, or out right disobeying your every request? Do you feel powerless in your
Many parents share with me that the idea of self-care sounds selfish. “How can I take time for myself when I don’t have time for my kids?” However, after implementing a consistent self-care routine they soon realize that there is a shift that occurs in their ability to handle tough parenting situation. This is quite simply because they have the energy to be present to their children. When we are truly present with our children we are able to parent with more compassion and understanding. We are able to set firm limits and boundaries and maintain them consistently with kindness and respect. When we are tired and exhausted we are more easily manipulated or caught off guard by even the smallest situations.
What is self-care? Self-care is different for each person. In order to find what works for you, take some time to reflect. Can you recall your life before you had children; maybe there is something you did then that you would like to do again? Is there something you have been thinking about doing but have never found the time to begin, like starting a class or a new hobby? Do you get a few minutes each day to yourself for reflection or meditation? Do you want to spend more time with friends, or your spouse or partner? What do you wish you had more of in your life?
After you have come up with some ideas about how you would like to practice self-care it is time to take action. Once you begin your new routine it is important to make sure that you keep this date with yourself. Remember, you are the most important thing on your to-do list. Some of my clients actually have a set day and time each week for themselves, which they never cancel. I, however, look at my schedule each week and find a time that works for my busy, less structured schedule and mark it, “Date with Marni”. Do what works best for you. Play around with it and enjoy your time. I know you will have a renewed sense of energy and ability to handle the tough parenting challenges that simply are part of being a good parent.
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