Absolute Fairness Isn't a Reality!

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Fairness can be a hot button for many people. Often the feelings and ideas one has of equity and fairness from childhood can dictate how this issue is handled in a family. If you are an adult who knows that the issue of fairness is something you

have a difficult time with, I would encourage you to go a little deeper for greater awareness and understanding about how you want to handle it with your own children. There are some things, however, you can do to help your child cope with their own developing constructs of fairness and justice.

When your child says, “That’s not fair”, listen to them and validate their feelings. Often times this can be all the child needs online casino no deposit bonus to move forward. You might say something like, “You are feeling like you aren’t being treated the same, and that is upsetting you.” You can also encourage your child to dig a bit deeper about their own sense of fairness by asking questions about how they are feeling, or maybe how they would handle the situation differently if they were the parent. Let them tell you why they think things are unfair. Give them in fantasy what they can’t have in reality. “If you had a magic wand and you could make everything fair wouldn’t that be great? What would everyone have first?” It is also important to share your rationalization about what the child finds unfair, but you do not need them to accept your reasons.

Refrain from making fairness something that you perpetuate between your children. We all know that absolute fairness and equality are not a reality, and it is an important bit of information your children need to understand while growing up. Children can learn that life is not fair, and they can learn solutions to solve problems of inequality. Do not attempt to rescue or fix things for your child when they feel like something is unfair. It is simply important that you understand their feelings and listen to them.

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